Sunday, May 14

I headed off to a new yarn store today. The owner was quite nice. Not much inventory there yet, but they are building on it. It was kind of hodgepodged together with cabinets and shelves but definitely cute.

Didn't do too much today, I wasn't in the mood. I am not normally the kind of person who gets all depressive about holidays and junk, but this Mother's day was hard on me for some reason. I know i have mentioned this one before, but will remind and update for the new readers out there. Both my parents have passed away. My dad passed nearly 10 years ago and my mom passed just over 6 years ago.

My mom had a very complicated death. She did die suddenly in her sleep but she went through a lot of medical problems for about 7 months before she died. It started a few years before hand. She stepped on a nail while outside and while not normally a really big issue for most people, she had diabetes. My mom was a little bit overweight but she was taking care of herself, her diabetes was under control and had no other really main problems. But as with a disease like that the small little wound on her foot became a full blown ulcer in the matter of two months. She was working with the doctor to try and get it healed but it wasn't healing and it was seeming to get worse. The doctors thought that it was mostly beacause there was something on the nail. It ended up being that they decided to amputate. She lost all five of her toes and a little bit of her foot. It was a little strange to see but she was still able to walk and drive and do most things. But unfortunately the doctor missed some of the infection and it festered. But it didn't show itself outside at least not yet. It worked its litte heart out on the inside slowly working up the my mom's leg and when my mom went to the hospital one October for a violent case of the flu, it worsened. Not to go into a lot of details, but the wound came back to the open and by the time the doctors really took a look at it it had gone almost to her knee.

She spent the next few weeks in and out of the hospital and then 2 days after thanksgiving in 1999, my aunt saw her leg and took her to the emergency room. (again not going into too much detail) they had her leg cut from the end of her foot up to her knee. She stayed like that for over a month before they worked on it. Becauase all the tissues had dried out they had to amputate. It was heartbreaking but my mom was strong. She never let it affect her. She worked hard at rehab and was ready to take on life again. Unfortunately the wound wasn't, she had to start going to hyperbaric treatments every day for 6 weeks. To heal the wound from the inside out. My mom passed away sometime in the middle of the night the day before her last treatment. She had the appointment later that afternoon to get fitted for a prosthetic. It was quite sudden. The death certificate says that it was from heart failure but we never found out for sure. There was an issue about getting an autopsy done but it didn't matter. my sisters and I could have fought for one but one of my uncles told us that we had to think about what our mom would want us to do. We all decided that it wasn't worth it. That our mom's memory was more important to us than a sheet of paper.

I hope that I didn't make this too much of a depressing post. I was just having a hard time this Mother's day. I don't know where it came from but I had to get it out. I will leave with this fab photo of my mom. It was her senior year in high school. I love this picture of her. She looks so young and sweet. I really look like her in this photo.

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